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Wednesday
May262010

The Ten Biggest Boobs in Tennis

Not that anyone knows but the French Open is upon us.  For the 114 passionate tennis fans around the world; this is sort of a big deal.  After checking out these few honeys below; tennis is going to get an explosion of new fans! 

Tennis is not that popular anymore.  It needs to spruce things up a little.  Maybe they should let fans throw stuff at the players, to periodically get them off of their game. 

Can you imagine if Andy Roddick was playing a French dude, and as he was about to serve up point/set/match – he gets hit in the face with a mustard and ketchup covered hotdog, or a bag of poop, or a bowl of steaming hot oatmeal?  How great would that be?  I would start watching tennis again. 

Maybe they can incorporate and make the Women’s Double Tournament to be played in the buff.  Sign Walt up!  

Tennis, in my humble opinion, needs to change the lingo a little to accommodate the new influx of fans.  They need to start calling tennis rackets – racks.  So we can all giggle when the announcer talks about racks and balls. 

“These two girls are slamming the balls with their racks!”  Amen sister! 

The following list of girls will not only change the tennis world – they will save lives.  You get a glimpse of these girls and you realize how life is worth living.  Picture of these girls should be plastered all over loony bins across the nation.  They would brighten up all the crazy dudes’ lives! 

Without further adieu:

 

10)   Jelena Dokic – (This picture does not show her front, but I beg you trust me.  This picture is picture perfect – does that make sense?)

 #1 nectar on tour - that's for sure

9)      Andy Roddick (Any list about boobs in tennis has to include Andy Roddick.  Is there a bigger boob in tennis than him?  How did this douche bag land Brooklyn Decker?  Is there a bigger injustice in the world today?)

 Walt drinks his Hateraide

8)      Nikola Hofmanova (She doesn’t have big boobs, she was just too cute to leave off the list.  Just look at her!  If people protest including her on the list – then I will cut off my double D man boobs and transplant them on her chest.  She can have them, for the sake of the list damn it! 

 Cocaine Princess smokes this girl

7)      Ludmila Skavronskaya – (I cannot tell from the picture, but I think Ludmilla has a uni-brow AND a uni-boob!)

6)      Mia Buric (She loves concentrating on balls.  Just look at the focus.  She really wants that ball!)

 Not the classic beauty but she cleans up awesome

5)      Petra Mandula – (Hel--lo!)

 They must get in the way

4)      Serena Williams – (She would break me in half, and I would accept the punishment, for being a bad naughty little boy.)

 

3)      Christi Potgieter (Something in my pant is very excited about the French Open this year…)

 

 

2)      Tamira Paszek – (I saw someone ask on Facebook the other day: “What was the greatest invention BEFORE sliced bread.” Answer: Cleavage. ) PS – She seems to be daydreaming of her own boobies in this picture.  At least that is what I like to think. 

 

 

1)      Simona Halep – She literally just made my laminated card of chicks I am allowed to cheat on Wifesense with.  (Not that one exists, but if it did, she would be on it, right behind Halle Berry.)  The crazy part about Simona and Walt’s pending relationship is – after we get married she will only have to change on letter in her name.  Halep to Haley.  It seems to be destiny.  How crazy is that?  It was meant to be Simona! 

  This is for

 

 

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Reader Comments (10)

Simona had them reduced.


*taps playing*

May 26, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterYellow Treats

To Yellow Treat:

I am heart broken. She is officially off of my list!

May 26, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterwaltsense

Did you mean 'laminated card'? Because I don't want to think about why the card needs to be laminated. Unless I have to.

May 26, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterShieldmaiden1196

there has been a large emptiness since Kornakovia left ....so it appears its been filled by big boobs.
Nice.

May 26, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterPRK

Shouldn't this article be titled "the 20 biggest boobs in tennis"??

June 1, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterThe Sampler

First of all, the no. 1 girl on this list actually had breast reduction surgery b/c her boobs were too big. Sad for us gents, but she thought it was hurting her game. Also, how could you not include Caroline Wozniacki? She is hot, a great player (top ten in the world right now) and her chest is well-regarded enough that if you do a search for Caroline Wozniacki on google, the words "Caroline Wozniacki breast size" appear in the top ten searches in the search dropdown. And you forgot Tatiana Golvin and Maria Kirlienko (both were in SI swimsuit mag). Plus Ana Ivanovic, who has an average boob size but is overall a good looking lady. 3 minutes of google research could have you netted you this info. Jelena Dokic looks better from that angle anyway. And Serena would get it I don't care what anyone says.

June 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterBigBalls

big balls - nice recap. You forgot to realize we don't watch Tennis but you obviously do. We'll done and keep up tennis boob research for us.

June 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterWaltsense

#9 = hilarious. I have always hated that dude.

Love that pic of Jelena Dokic. She is HOT!

Man, Serena Williams boobs in that pic kind of look like a UFO considering how pancake shaped they are.

Speaking of tennis, I am currently reading that Andre Agassi autobiography, "Open." Definitely a good read.

June 4, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterRico Swaff

I counted 19 Boobs. Loved 18 of them

Nice site; Nice Post.

June 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterRealestDudeintheRoom

Really big boobs in Tennis.

June 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAsif

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